3.7.21
[[Reposted and some updates on 4.12.21 as I turn these into individual blog posts]]
Matthew 6:1-2
Share with God the tension you feel between knowing what to do and actually doing it:
Knowing what to do and then actually doing it, I am an expert on the “not doing”. That is not to say I act in opposition, or do the wrong thing, I do what I “feel” and “know” is right, but I do not properly Wait for the next step. God points me in a direction and I say “I got this” and then reason/think/brain my way through the next steps… on a journey of 1000 miles, even a degree or two puts you in a pretty different place. That is ME. So I go the right direction, but I end up a degree or two off… so I do not end up where God has called, or wanted me to be, because I have not been Faithful enough, Waited or been Patient enough to allow Him to give me the nest step, and the next and the next. I know and believe I am not far off… he does not allow me to stray too far, but just far enough that when I get there I KNOW I am not where He wanted.
I look at my goals and dreams and I can see where I did not hit them, and why. In 2008-2010 I was on a solid path with a small business to get some financial goals done. The economy crashed, and I am def not saying it crashed me because I was not Faithful, but I could have easily weathered that crash a lot better than I did. Why didnt I make it through better? A few small things different and I would have, but I did not. 2010 I filed bankruptcy and on paper lost about 1.25M, actual cash in bank, 80-100K, but the businesses were worth a lot more, had I weathered the storm better. I did not listen. I thought I knew better. I thought I had it figured out. He CLEARLY told me I did not… I pushed forward anyway in 2008 and 2009 and 2010 was the fruits of that, a bankruptcy.
